Show not Tell!

This term, one of our writing goals is to add detail to our writing. One way to do this is to 'show' rather than 'tell'. This also makes our writing way more interesting for the reader too!
We looked at these pictures of the mudslide at camp and talked about what emotions we might feel before, during and after the slide experience. Below is how we would 'show' rather than 'tell' those emotions.

v

Tell	Show
Adrenaline, pumped up, amped, exhilerated	Blood pumping through my veins . My heart felt like it was running laps I could feel the adrenaline pumping through my veins. my face lit up when I saw the slide racing down the track my heart felt like it was about to break out of my chest because it was beating so hard My heart began pounding against my chest alex My heart began pounding against my chest I feel the blood pumping through my body .Then I throw myself off.
shocked	I could feel my eyes getting wider and wider as I was getting closer to the end. Laura  My eyes popping out of my face. I could feel my eyes popping out of my head as I got to the bottom. Laura Christie: i felt my eyes getting bigger and wider as if they were going to POP out in front of me
nervous	I looked down and my stomach dropped letting people in front of me to prepare for it chris     The butterflies woke up in my tummy when I saw the length of the slide. By Chloe I felt the butterflies swarming in my stomach My stomach dropped with nerves like my heart just dropped out of my stomach My heart was beating and the eels were squirming  in my tummy. Laura The butterflies entered my stomach . i was feeling really twitchy dean I gulped as I sped down the slide
scared	I stood at the back of the line hoping that I didn’t get seen I stood right at the back of the line, I would do anything to not do this. My heart was beating faster than I could imagine.
happy	Christie: I felt my smile go from one cheek to the other as the smile grew wider and wider as my dimples went in further. My face had adopted a smile as I exited the mud There was a smile on my face. The unecspected face came out of nowhere. I felt my smile get bigger and bigger
relieved	I felt my worries disappear as I climbed out of water When my legs pulled my hypo body out of the mud pit a big wave of relief rushes through my body - Maddie I was of the slide all of my eels were gone and I felt like a hole lot of weight was of my shoulders. Laura As it ended i calmed down . Soooo glad that that was over.
proud	I was drunk with success. alex ☃☃☃☃☃☃☃☃☃☃
sore	I felt sore            I felt as if I had just biked a marathon on a carbon seat. alex My butt ached My butt was throbbing, there were way too many bumps.